Here are the top five cover stories that alternative papers should avoid in order to prevent irate parents from complaining that the paper is in the library lobby where their six year old could see it, based on a true incident involving Seattle Weekly cover art that featured the words “Fuck School.”

Santa Claus: We Prove He Isn’t Real
Matches: Super Fun
Plastic Bags: the New Hip Toy
The Best Ways to Kick and Punch Friends and Family
Five-Second Rule? More Like Five Minutes!

Well, that was quick. A thing many posters at Whedonesque don’t seem to get is that Tim has a development deal with Fox (the studio, not the network), so they’re paying him whether the series works or not. Yeah, there won’t be another episode order, but it’s not like he would have gotten kickbacks on the ad sales, anyway. He’ll be back.

In today’s movie adventure, my date and I saw Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie Film for Theaters and Hot Fuzz. ATHF was, I believe, as good as it could possibly be, with the opening bit better than I could have imagined. I was a little surprised and disappointed that the performance wasn’t Dethklok, but it was still wonderful.
I feel like HF was trying to do too much, but it was still okay.
The real surprise, though, was the previews. I wanted to go see every movie previewed at ATHF except one, and that one I would Netflix, though I might not make it past the first five minutes. Those movies?
Knocked Up
Waitress
Superbad
1408 (my date did not want to see this one, but John Cusack and Sam Jackson sold me despite Stephen King)
The Condemned is the one I would Netflix and wish it was Battle Royale.
Wow, you’re saying to yourself, Craig sure is a big girl. But Seth Rogan and Nathan Fillion, man! They’ve created ideal date movies for nerds. But why?

The rush to grab every possible domain name seems to have slowed down a whole lot, because Buffy Season 8 Issue 1 has been out there for more than a month, and thricewise.com and thricewise.org were both still available a few minutes ago (thricewise.everything-else still is, as far as I recall or care).

I bet somebody already grabbed the gmail address, but I don’t care enough to check.

An important safety tip when changing out your steering wheel:

Store the air bag in a safe area with the bag portion facing upwards. This will prevent launching of the air bag assembly in case of accidental deployment.

I’m not sure I can explain why I find minipops so charming. They’re just very very small, yet still recognizable.

The quality is not the best, but I think you get the gist: crows hate seagulls.